I believe my family thrives on distraction. distraction from difficult questions, from things on the ominous to-do list, from each other, from worries, from phone calls, from...more things I can't think of.

which explains why we keep hitting the "next" button on Netflix, to watch one more episode of CSI: New York. or two. or three.

this also helps to explain the root of my procrastinating nature and facebook addiction. There is no "doer" in my blood. Just look at my family. sometimes, I can see this as a good thing--I comfort myself by saying that I am more chill than people who always have to have a project, that I have an easier time of being in the present moment, and that I am more Mary than Martha. But I also have difficulty accomplishing things. And it does, in fact, bother me.

[half an hour later]

my blogging was happily interrupted by a witching-hour phone call from my BFF bestie. A random, catching-up phone call. always fun.

but now I can't remember much regarding what I was so contemplative about. maybe it's for the best. it's late.

I did want to end, however, with this list of books stacked on my desk, all of which I would like to read before the end of summer. ambitious to say the least, and there are actually more on my must-read list than on my desk

The Joyful Christian by C.S. Lewis

Say You're One of Them by Uwem Akpan ("ANOTHER Africa book?" my mother asked.)

Questions About Angels by Billy Collins

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott

Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott

Story by Steven James

Rocket Boys by Homer Hickam, Jr.

Captivating by John and Stasi Elderidge (again)

Cry, the Beloved Country by Alan Paton

oh, and the Bible by...Jesus? (ha, just kidding. but not about reading the Bible.)

and to add to the sortofrandomness, I leave with what I think I have decided to be my life verse. perhaps.

"I pray that our of His glorious riches he may srengthen you with power through
His spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through
faith. And I pray that you may...grasp how wide and long and high and deep is
the love of Christ--and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may
be filled...with all the fullness of God." --Eph. 4:16-19

I just can't think of a better thing to pray for than a real, present knowledge of His love. I think that maybe after that, the other things we might pray for in ourselves would fall into place.